Game Day Wake-Up Call
The University of Notre Dame Proudly Presents . . .
Game Day, Wake Up. It’s 7:00 a.m. on Saturday and the alarm is going off. One and only one thing could rouse a man from the inevitably wicked katzenjammer that is just starting to take hold at that unholy hour. Our Lady’s longstanding and proud Catholic tradition of community service notwithstanding, the only selfless act of charity we performed in our tenure there was the game day wake up call. And like the noble mailman, neither rain, nor sleet, nor booting after sitting up in bed would deter us from our designated rounds.
Fish a delicious Natty Light from the pool of water at the bottom of your garbage can, move your roommate’s speakers into the hall, set the volume to ten, and play “Notre Dame Gameday Wake Up Call”.
The rousing “fanfare” portion of our program gave us just enough time to take a quick spin around the Grace Hall section, reminding our classmates that it was in fact a game day and that they would be well advised to wake up. While not very nuanced, pounding on the doors and shouting “Game Day, Wake Up!” was fairly effective. A nice audience generally emerged into the hall right about the time that the fanfare wound up and the PA announcer belted out his immortal words, “The University of Notre Dame proudly presents its marching band. The band of the Fighting Irish!” Standing proudly in our underwear, towels draped across our shoulders like the Irish tartan, when the Victory March starts, we break into the Guard’s high-stepping, fist-pumping march, executing perfect spin-turns when we hit the corners on the way to the showers. If the music didn’t wake them up, the horrific panorama of our hung-over, smelly, pasty, fat asses hitting the spin-turn most certainly did. It was game day, and our work there was done.
With these fond memories in mind, we share with you the “Notre Dame Gameday Wake Up Call(3:02)” for your own game day wake up call – f.y.i., longer towels look better in the spin. Enjoy.
-The Crow of Truth
August 31st, 2006 at 3:54 pm
I love it; I’ll let you know what the wife thinks around 5:30AM PST on Saturday. My prediction is that the reaction will be less than positive.
She’ll be in a better mood once we get her nice and drunk and she’s wearing her BQ jersey.
August 31st, 2006 at 3:56 pm
I’ll be calling everyone I know that morning playing it for them. I’m not in this to make friends. Just to generate hype.
August 31st, 2006 at 4:08 pm
The Crow of Truth always speaks the truth. CAW… CAW…
Thanks Crow
September 1st, 2006 at 2:16 am
Those… are some bigass speakers. lol
September 1st, 2006 at 5:07 am
Chadros, you act like women have feelings that matter. Come on, you know better than that…
September 1st, 2006 at 7:50 am
J$ – love this! Brings back memories of Nate, walking around in his boxers with one hand down his pants and the other holding the phone, planning for the weekend ahead. He would hang up the phone and, through sips of a piss-warm Natty Light or Beast, would say something like:
“So, Wayne, I was talkin’ to some people on the phone and I got the plan… After the pep rally, we’re gonna hit CJ’s for some burgers and beers. Apparently that’s where the (insert visiting team here) cheerleaders are hanging out, and one of them is my friend from Chisago Lakes’, lab partner’s, roommate’s friend from home, so we’re in! You remember her – she’s that one blond we met at the graffiti dance. Anyway, then I figure we hang out at Bridgets until close – I can send my fake out the back door and you can use it to get in. Wear a lid so they don’t know you don’t have blond hair. Better yet, see if O’Malley has his brother’s old ID. Anyway, then, we can head on over to Turtle Creek where there’s a late-night keg party that this one girl in my freshman lit class told me about. Dood, she’s got like three hot roommates and they’re all gonna be there! Check ‘em out in the dogbook. When we get back to Grace, we’ll order up some Papa John’s – make sure Smootz orders extra butter sauce for the crust – and watch Sportscenter. Man, I hope Michigan loses tomorrow. Corso sucks! Sleep for 2 hours or so, grab a bagel at the dining hall, then head to Fereday’s tailgater – they always bring the good beer and Mr. Fereday always has that Johnny Walker Black label for us. Sweet! Then, we hit the game – remember to wear The Shirt! Where’re those chicks from Farley sitting? B-Mags is gonna get like 3 interceptions. After we crush (insert team here), we can grab Victory Dinner at North Dining Hall and chill for a few hours and watch the game replay on Gracevision. Shower up around 10:00 – time for “we will rock you” – I’ll get it started. While we’re getting ready, we can get that Schlitz leftover from our party from Strohs fridge. Andy finished it all? Well, Wigfield, OB and them are all getting’ 40’s, so maybe we can bum some from them. Then, there’s like four parties to hit – that hot chick O’Malley knows from Kansas – you know, the one that lives in P.E… Anyway, she and her friends are going over to Sorin, but those guys are dicks. But, after that they are heading to Pangborn where Meredeth and Andrea are having people over, so we can hook up with them there. Should be a good time, and if they want to stay here, just sneak them down the back stairs around 4:00 so we don’t get busted for parietals. Dood, Zushlag is a prick.. Since the beds are hidden by the wardrobe, you should be OK back there. Just keep that Shai CD down… Runnabaum and Bob will be trying to sleep. On Sunday morning, O’Malley’s parents are taking us to the Pancake House for breakfast at 11:00, so we have to get up early. I’ll need to get back for the Vikings game later.
Should be a cool weekend. Hopefully Florida or somebody ahead of us would have lost so we can move into the top-5. Dood, I forgot to call the Flanner guys.! There’s some Cuervo over there, take a shot!”
Ah, the memories. I’m sure I forgot many things, and would love any comments and additions. I seriously haven’t been this psyched for a season since we were all at school.
September 1st, 2006 at 4:10 pm
The Crow of Truth….ahhh, how I love the Crow of Truth.
For those of you that missed the spin turns because you were still trying to get out from underneath your mattress after a 3am mattress flip (Hoody), they were ambrosia for the eyes.
LET’S GO IRISH!!!