Irish Round Table

This sucks. Looking at the college football landscape it seems that the Irish are right back in the hunt for the number 2 ranking and the BCS Title Game. That’s not the sucky part. This is: Domers have to pull for Michigan and USC to win this weekend. Ouch. This is going to be painful.

The IRT is here to help. Here is a step-by-step weekend schedule to get you through the weekend:

Noon Friday: Sit the family down. Take this opportunity to sit your wife, kids, and dog down to explain what will happen this weekend. Give them the rundown on why USC and Michigan victories are essential to Notre Dame’s chances at a national title run. Please remind them that this is only a one day occurrence hopefully never to be repeated.

Friday Afternoon: Find a USC player. Give him some cash, jewelry, or free flight to San Diego. We learned the hard way last year that Trojans play better when they’re paid. Trust us, it will be a couple hundred dollars well spent.

Friday night: Drink. Drinking won’t really help the Irish this weekend but it is still highly recommended.

Saturday Morning: Remove the Michigan diapers from your kids. Change out the Wolverine toilet paper with Ohio State brand.

Saturday 2:30(Eastern): Pull your Troy Smith vodoo doll out of the closet. A Michigan win not only keeps ND’s chances at a Title alive, but it also opens up the Heisman race.

Saturday night after the games: Wash yourself vigorously. Use soap. Lots and lots of soap. Better yet, make it Irish Spring.

Sunday: Go to Church. Ask for forgiveness.

May we never speak of this weekend again.

This entry was posted on Thursday, November 16th, 2006 at 8:37 pm and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.